Harry Potter and that Damn Wedding
by Georgey The Monkey
Summary: Harry Potter's first-born, Kirin,is getting married in three weeks,and Harry has yet to find a present.The nearer the wedding day appraoches, the more chaos there is. Can Harry find a present AND survive?


**Harry Potter and That _Damn _Wedding**

**Chapter One**

* * * * 

Harry Potter sat in Hermione's mini-library, a.k.a. Harry's Office, staring at a piece of parchment that lay rolled out on his desk. He stared at it expectantly, as if it were to come alive and bark at him for not writing anything on it. Then again, this being one of those parchments that suddenly come alive if you don't write anything on it after fifteen minutes of it rolled out in front of you. Harry sighed as he felt a cold wind roll by from the open window to the left of him, the parchment giving a slight flutter.

Harry dipped his quill with ink and put a little dot on the parchment, then stared at it once again. He was supposed to help Kirin, his 20-year-old first born, with her first wedding. _And maybe the last, _Harry thought in his mind hopefully. Harry, like almost every other protective and loving father out there, did not like losing their daughters to some _man_ she met on her job overseas, or some _man_ she met in a club, or some _man_ she supposedly fell in love with during a date at the beach-

_Face it, Potter, you've become what Mr. Granger was when Hermione introduced you as her **single** best friend: protective. Overly protective_, Harry grumbled mentally. He shook his head, and rested them in his hands, feeling suddenly so utterly depressed by his daughter's sudden wedding. Well, sure Kirin _had_ told Harry this ten months ago, her and that brilliant, annoyingly charming Matthew Mettler, were to wed. 

Harry heard the door creak open behind him, and heard a cheerful voice question, "Harry! What're you doing here?"

"Why, Ron, I am sitting in my office, trying to think of a way I can help Kirin's wedding," Harry replied blatantly. He turned his office chair around and gave his best friend of- well, frankly, Harry lost count of the years. "What're _you_ doing here, Ron?"

"Paying my best friend a visit, of course!" Ron plopped down on one of the six soft, comfortable, red, cushion-y chairs and gave Harry a little wave. "How's been your day, Harry?"

"Just wonderful," said Harry. "Kirin's wedding is in three weeks, and I have yet to find her a wedding present." 

"Oh, bollocks, Harry," Ron said, "You know you have one in mind, you're just not sure if she and that fiancé of hers will like it." He stood up and wandered over to one of the tall bookshelves stuffed with books that were about from werewolves to how to make your hair bright pink, and several other colors. He took one of the books from the shelves and glanced at the cover (_Orange Wizarding Dye for Orangutans _by William Cook), raising an eyebrow, "Wizarding dye? How long does _that_ last?"

"Ron, I honestly don't know what the hell to get those two...ki- those two," Harry said, slamming his head on his desk. "I mean, they have almost practically _everything_. Mettler is an heir to one of the biggest Muggle companies there ever _is_ around this time-"

Ron shut the book he was holding so suddenly that it made Harry jump and stop talking abruptly. "_Muggle_ company? _Heir_?" He asked Harry in a way that Harry didn't like at all; the kind of way that made Harry's lips quiver and hide in a closet from the red-head. 

"Y-yes," Harry stammered. "Er- um...w-why?" 

"Harry, Mettler isn't a Muggle, is he?"

Harry shook his head, "Last time I checked, no."

"If he isn't, how is he an heir to a _Muggle_ company?" Ron asked, raising an eyebrow. 

"Hmm...that _is_ a good question..." Harry mumbled to himself. "Well, I'll just ask him that when he comes over here for dinner-"

"He's coming for dinner?"

"What's with all the questions?"

"Er...never mind, then," Ron said.

"Well, if it would help anything, if you _are_ trying to find something out of this...this, then I'd have you know that Mettler is a pure-blood," Harry said.

"Good," Ron breathed in relief. He blinked then stuttered, "I-I mean, well, glad that Kirin isn't marrying a Muggle. Some Muggles are awfully naive, you know."

Harry nodded, looking at Ron. "Yes. Yes, some Muggles are." 

Ron checked his watch and headed towards the door. "Anyway, Harry, I've got to get going. I've to pick up Lavender from work; she, er, had an accident with her car. You know what I mean, don't you, mate?"

"Ah, yes. Draco has the same problem, I think," Harry said, eyeing Ron with an odd look in his eye. 

Ron seemed to notice this because he turned away quickly and busied himself out the door, giving Harry another little wave on his way. Harry stared after his best friend, his green eyes going into a darker shade as he felt suspicion spread through his body. Ron had reacted strangely, and he didn't know why. He thought that maybe it had something to do with Mettler being an heir to a Muggle company, then again, Harry wouldn't know unless he asked his best friend why.

Harry sighed and tuned his head to the side, facing a piece of parchment that now had a pair of cartoon-like eyes that looked menacing in an angry way, and a mouth that was twisted in a way that Harry couldn't describe. Harry blinked, and hid his urge to laugh; It looked funny and adorably cute to Harry, like how Kirin had looked when she was frustrated when she was 4. 

"Oh, what're you smiling at?" the parchment snarled nastily. 

"Nothing, dear parchment, nothing," Harry replied pleasantly, smiling in an even more pleasant way to the parchment.

"Ah, shut up. Now write something on me, or else bad luck will swarm you for the next three weeks," the parchment said, nastier than it had spoke last time.

"Sure, sure, bad luck for the next three weeks. I'll keep that in mind," Harry said, winking. He took his quill and dipped it in ink.

"You better. Now _write_!" the parchment snapped. "Honestly, wizards these days."

Harry gave a little laugh, causing the parchment to sneer up at him. Harry dropped a few drops of the ink on the parchment's face, making it growl fervently. "You amuse me little parchment," Harry said, "I'm going to have to call the company that made you...they sure are brilliant."

"If I'd have you know, those parchments that P.M. Inc. makes are just plain _rude_," the parchment said. "They snap, bark, throw jinxes at you, and make you regret of ever buying the product. And therefore, P.M. Inc. doesn't exist any more because no one would buy those parchments after a few weeks of-"

"It went bankrupt?" Harry cut. "Hmm...I really _have_ been missing out on a lot...I guess I should start reading the Daily Prophet more...like I did _before_ this damn wedding..."

"Yes, you have. As I was saying, wizards and witches did not bother buying those parchments because they had caused _many_ disasters at work, school, at home, and some other places, and would rather not have them happen."

Harry propped one of his elbows on the desk and rested his cheek on it. "You know, you sure are rather smart for a parchment-"

"-I was once alive, you twit," the parchment cut rudely. "And if I'd have you know, I _knew_ your mother and father when we were in school in Hogwarts."

"Oh, really?" Harry said. "Who were you then?"

"I was, and still _am,_ Macy McGilly," the parchment replied.

"You sound like you were in Slytherin-"

"-I was in Ravenclaw-"

"-and that you were a pompous ass who order people around a lot-"

"-I was an outcast, with friends and an attitude-"

"-and not to mention that you didn't even _know _my parents-"

"-I did, we just weren't friends, just acquaintances-"

"-And that you were-"

"-can we just stop this?" snapped the parchment. "Now, yes, I may have seemed like a pompous ass then, but I am much like your Granger-"

"-It's Hermione Granger-Potter, _McGill_-"

"-Macy, please," said Macy. "No need for formality. Well, maybe, but I hated how people said my last name."

"But I know you love it when _I_ say it," Harry said, winking down at it.

"Oh, shut up." Macy gave Harry a pointed glare, then sighed. "I believe that you need _help_ with your daughter's wedding, and I have decided that you need me on this, and am very available with that help you need, so therefore, I am here to help you."

Harry smiled. "Ah, yes, I would need plenty of help, but I'd rather not get help from you. You irritate me too much."

Macy went pink with anger, or at least, Harry _thought_ it was anger, and he chuckled at the odd pinkish look the parchment now had. 

"Dammit, here I am, volunteering to help you when what my _real_ job was to make you scream for you bloody red-head friend to come back, and you act like you don't even _need _help!"

"You make it sound like I have mental disorder-" 

"-Well, I think you do now," Macy said.

"You know what?" Harry said, picking up the parchment ("Put me _down_, Potter!" Macy shrieked), and walking out of the mini-library. "I'm going to fold you up and put you in a container."

"Hey! No!" 

Harry laughed. "I kid."

"Yeah, sure you do," said Macy haughtily. "Well, I suppose I should go-"

"-how can you go? You're a parchment- er, ghost, as you may put it," said Harry.

"Stop cutting me, dammit! Well, anyway, I'm going to leave this parchment, and come back in something else that you might be using at the time-"

"-Where are you going?" Harry asked curiously.

"I'm going to be around," Macy replied shortly. "I'll return with something for you. Well, goodbye-"

"-Dammit! How can you just leave me, I mean I don't-" Harry stopped abruptly and stared at the paper as the "face" of Macy had been on fade away and vanish. 

"Harry?" Hermione's voice came from one of the corridors. "Harry, you're home? I thought you had Auror meeting."

"It got cancelled at the last minute. That bloke from Norway backed out on the last minute, and Moody had said we needed _everyone_," Harry said, taking a final glance at the piece of parchment before folding it up and putting it in his pant's pocket. 

Hermione's figure came up from the corridor to the left of Harry and she walked up to him, still in her Wizarding robes. "How was your day, Harry? Been thinking about Kirin's gift, hmm?" She gave him a hug. "Let's go talk it out in the kitchen, 'kay?" 

"Yes, and a great deal, too," said Harry, giving his wife a kiss and leading her towards the kitchen. "I just _don't_ know what to get them, and it's frustrating me now."

"It's okay, Harry. Ginny's 'studies' has proved that men can be extra slow in finding their daughter a wedding present rather than their son's," Hermione said reassuringly. 

They both entered the kitchen, which was blue, as of now, meaning the mood was calm. After all, it was color-changing, depending on the majority mood of the people in the kitchen so far. It was designed and furnished with a modern-ish look: a metal stove, oven, refrigerator, sink, dish-washer (well, they really didn't _need_ it, but Hermione had felt that a little Muggle dishwasher in the house would do some good to a few people), the counter surface of marble, and the cabinets, pantry, chairs, and the table where they spend their meals, unless there's a special occasion, were made of dark wood. 

"Ginny was _playing_ when she said that, Hermione," Harry said, opening the refrigerator, and taking out the bottle of pumpkin juice.

Hermione opened a cabinet and took out two glasses and set them on the counter in front of Harry. She dragged a chair over to the counter were Harry stood and sat on it. "I know, Harry, I know. But I thought it would make you a bit more confident or at least a bit better on the subject."

Harry poured some pumpkin juice into the two glasses. "I'll probably _never_ feel more confident on that, unless I actually find Kirin and that fiancé a present." 

Hermione tsk'd, shaking her head. She took a glass and started heading outside of the kitchen, stopping to look back and reply to Harry's question, "Where're you going?" and replying a simple, "To my mini-library to finish the work I didn't finish at work." 

And once again, the Potter-man was alone. He drank his pumpkin juice almost hastily, then walked over to the sink and rinsed his glass. His mind began to wander back on that McGilly, and he frowned. Part of him thought that this was just some merchandise Hermione had bought, while the other part of him actually believed that piece of parchment actually existed around the time his parents had gone to school. He shook his head, the silent sound of the water going through his hands and the glass somewhat soothing him.

He sighed and shut the faucet off, putting the glass on the counter out of laziness to put it back in one of the many cabinets in the kitchen. He walked, slightly slouching, out of the kitchen, and wandered around the house until he bumped into a jumpy Draco Malfoy, who had been hiding in a storage closet clutching a small wooden box. He had jumped out of the closet, almost as if someone, or something, had scared him out of the there, and had come face to face with a dazed looking Harry, who had, of course, been wandering around his home.

"H-Harry, what're you doing around here?" Draco asked, a look of fear in his eyes.

Harry blinked and stared at Draco dumbly. "This is _my_ house," he said. "What're _you_ doing _here_?"

"Er...n-nothing," Draco said. He peeked over Harry's shoulder and his eyes widened. "Got to run, Harry. Nice, er, seeing you again, mate!"

"Uh, yeah. You too, Draco," Harry said. He watched as Draco peered over Harry's shoulder once more, shriek a higher note than last time, and Apparate away to God knows where. Harry was slightly fazed by this, and he turned around, to see Ginny look around her carefully as if looking for something. "Ginny?"

"Huh?" Ginny's eyes shot up and looked at Harry. "Who are- Oh! Hi, Harry! Have you seen Draco?"

Harry frowned. "Er, yes, he was here...a moment ago...he, er, Apparated."

"Thank you, Harry, I was looking for him," Ginny said, looking quite pleased. Then, in a quieter tone, she muttered, "Where could that ninny be..."

Harry shook his head, once again, after Ginny herself Apparated as well, to God knows where, like Draco had. _Just _what _has my life come to?_

_* * * *_

**Author's Note: **Hey! This is Kinnoko speaking! So, what'd you think? Good? Bad? Average? Over the top? Horrible? Just...er...well, you know what I mean. Tell me what you think in your review, please! I'd really love to get a review on my story. Because, if I get more than _at least_ 5 reviews that state what they think of my story, what I did wrong, what I _might_ be doing wrong, or some other thing like that, then that means that I would update soon! 

So anyway, why were Draco and Ginny in the Potter household? Why was Ron acting all weird on the subject of Mettler, Kirin's fiancé, being a Muggle? And what about Macy McGilly? What's she bringing, and is she _really _a spirit who decided to help Harry with the wedding thing? Or is Macy McGilly just a product Hermione had bought, thinking that it was cute? Oh, and what _is_ Harry's life coming to?

All the answers to those questions will be on the next upcoming chapters, or might never appear at all! Most likely, the will, but anyway! Don't forget to leave a review and make Kinnoko happy, or make her understand _what_ she did wrong, or _should_ do!

'Til the next chapter,

( ^^ ) Kinnoko


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